Just displaying a number of the above signs does not necessarily mean you are codependent.
However, a high number of them could indicate that you may have codependent tendencies. Another way to evaluate whether or not you may be codependent is to complete a codependency questionnaire like the one below.
These questionnaires can be a good indicator of whether you have codependency issues but should not replace a professional diagnosis.
We suggest you do the questionnaire and then contact one of our professionals at Cirque Lodge if you would like to explore the results further.
How to use the questionnaire:
- Examine each statement and respond with a True or False
- There are no correct or incorrect answers
- Answer as honestly as you can
- I am my number one priority.
- I think I understand how other people feel more than I understand how I feel.
- I am happy in my relationship with my partner.
- I find it easy to appear okay on the outside, even though I am dying inside.
- I have a lot of great friends and relationships.
- I would not want to go on vacation alone.
- I am able to deal with whatever life throws at me in a calm or collected manner. I rarely ever lose my temper or get upset.
- I feel like I am underachieving.
- When a romantic relationship becomes toxic or makes me unhappy, I have no problem removing myself from it.
- I will always help others, even if it means putting myself out.
- I never get health anxiety.
- I am not happy in my closest relationship.
- I find it easy to let people know when I am angry with them.
- I do not enjoy spending time on my own.
- I find it easy to remove myself from a situation – I trust that issues can resolve themselves without my input.
- I regret a lot of things that I have done.
- When I was growing up, I found it easy to discuss problems with other members of my family.
- I often wonder why I feel like I have to do so much for other people.
- I set aside time every week for my own self-care.
- I find it difficult to make decisions.
Scoring Yourself in the Codependency Test
You get 1 point for every “False” you answered for odd-numbered questions and 1 point for every “True” for even-numbered questions.
The maximum number you could score is 20. The closer you are to 20, the more likely it is that you are displaying codependent tendencies. Remember, codependency is not black and white. It is a condition that lives on a spectrum. If you are even slightly worried about any of your answers to these questions, please contact our team at Cirque Lodge.
For years the concept of codependency has come under criticism for being loosely defined, however in the last couple of decades, more empirical research has been done to help individuals suffering from the signs and symptoms of codependency. We are now fully aware that this is a relationship dynamic that can impact anyone with any sort of developmental trauma in their background, not just those with alcoholism or addiction running through their family.
The good news is that there are ways and means to overcome codependency. With professional help, you can understand that while you can have healthy loving relationships, each individual is responsible for their own feelings and behavior.